For those of you who haven’t seen the new Netflix series, Orange is the New Black, you are missing out. The new series, written by Jenji Kohan, who also wrote the hit series Weeds, is as provocative as it is entertaining. This show is bound to clean house at the Emmys next year, you heard it here first.
The show’s protagonist, Piper Chapman, is your typical blonde WASP who enjoys shopping at Whole Foods and watching Mad Men with her adorable pushover fiance, Larry, played by Jason Biggs. When the show begins, Piper is coming to terms with the fact that she is about to serve a 15 month sentence for a crime she committed during her “wild” years, when she dated a Lesbian drug smuggler named Alex, played by Laura Prepon. Piper was convicted of being a mule for drug money just 2 years before the statute of limitations for the crime was over. Aint that a Biatch!
Some pretty hilarious shiz goes down during the course of her stay at the prison. Including but not limited to: becoming another woman’s prison wife by accident, being “starved out” by the head cook for insulting her food, again, by accident, and coming face-to-face with her former lover, Alex, who, by the way, is the reason that she is in there in the first place.
But that’s not why I brought you here today. Yes, the show is good and worth a watch, but the real cutie of the show is a Corrections Officer Bennett, who accidentally gets an inmate pregnant during the show, but in a cute way, I promise.
Or at least, I thought he was cute, before I saw this article on Buzzfeed, For Everyone Who Is Physically Attracted To Corrections Officer Bennett. Which made him look like a real douche. The article details what he did before he was on the show, which was a personal trainer/body builder. It also provides pictures of him posing in a bikini. Don’t get me wrong, he looks good, my hat is off to him. But who in their right mind would post pictures like that on the internet of themselves? A douche bag, that’s who. #disappointed
Then I noticed that the Buzzfeed article was written by a dude, which explains it all….